Graduating from college was an experience. If I had to sum up college in one word all the way to graduation day, it was an experience.
I learned so much about myself being in college and I learned so much about the world by being in college. All the stress. All the worries. All the things that made me want to go “fuck this shit” was all for December 19, 2014, 9:30 a.m.
Graduation day is one of those days you want to experience everyday. Time to slow down while you bask in your cap and gown. You want to feel that triumph everyday of your life to reflect on the things you told yourself you couldn’t do but end of doing anyways. And what is momentous day without drama and more stress and my graduation day had some of each. But that’s life and it was all for that day, so it makes you just breathe and say, “it’s my graduation.”
Still as I type this, it has not clicked that I graduated from college just a couple of days ago. Part because everything has been a sequence for me up until that day and after. It was a lot on my mind that didn’t really allow for me to grasp that I was soon to become a college graduate. Worrying about finals & passing all my classes, sort graduation tickets , packing my room, taking my finals, getting everything prepared for my ceremonies (get to them on time), attend graduation, move out my dorm, make restaurant reservations, drive to ATL, drive back home for four hours and unpack my car, I just felt like I never had a moment to think about graduation even though everything I was doing was for graduation. And now I’m sick! Does that make sense? Like just going through the actions but not being in the moment because I was constantly thinking about the next thing I had to do.
It stills feels as if I will be going back for spring. I don’t completely feel…..well free.
When people would ask me whether I was excited I would say no because my mind was just cluttered with what I had or needed to do that wasn’t allowing myself to anticipate what was I was about to do–graduate. I would get excited here and there for a few seconds and just as quick as it came it went. But I did get excited.
The day before my first commencement ceremony (my college held a separate ceremony for its graduates). I couldn’t sleep. During the ceremony it felt as if I was sitting in an awards ceremony, not my graduation ceremony. That made me excited for the next day, the day I graduated from my university. I was thankful and felt very blessed to be able to have two commencement ceremonies. Part for my relatives to have a choice (because I had limited tickets for Friday) and that I could relive the feeling the next day. The next day was just as beautiful and I couldn’t believe I was sitting with my fellow classmates tingling with anticipating of moving that tassel to the left. As I drove to Atlanta, I got teary-eyed because I truly felt as if I could do anything that I wanted to. I felt powerful.
What’s an experience without regrets and bumps, of course I have some but nothing can overshadow the fact that I am a college graduate.